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I suppose this explains why he's always so jolly...
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A lawyer runs a stop sign and gets pulled over by a sheriff's deputy in Opp , Alabama . He thinks that he is smarter than the deputy because he is a lawyer from New ...
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Every year, English teachers from across the country can submit their collections of actual similes and metaphors found in high school essays. These excerpts are published each ...
Viewed 8 times
A High School English Teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. She tells the class that there would be no excuse for not showing up, except for a serious injury or ...
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I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless woman who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner. I took out my wallet, ...
Viewed 8 times
Teaching Math in 1950:
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production
is 4/5 of the price. What is his profit?
Teaching Math in 1960:
A logger ...
Viewed 8 times
If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you
would have produced enough sound energy to heat one
cup of coffee.
(Hardly seems worth it )
If you farted consistently ...
Viewed 7 times
1. Your Houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them. 2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question. 3. You keep more food than beer in the ...
Viewed 7 times
An idiot decided to start a chicken farm, so he bought a hundred chickens to start. A month later, he returned to the dealer for another hundred chickens because all of the first ...
Viewed 7 times
Merry Christmas...
Viewed 7 times
Mike never dreamed that slowly cruising on his Harley Davidson Fat-Boy motorcycle through a residential neighborhood could be so incredibly dangerous! Little did Mike suspect. Mike ...
Viewed 7 times
A very confident James Bond walks into the English bar and takes a
seat next to a very attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance, then
casually looks at his watch for a ...
Viewed 7 times
The Pope is visiting DC and President Bush takes him out for an afternoon on
the Potomac... sailing on the pres. yacht, the Sequoia. They're admiring the
sights when, all of a ...
Viewed 7 times
Here are some new taglines collected from various dark corners of the
Internet...
Mary Shafer of NASA Ames has said, "Insisting on perfect safety is for
people who don't ...
Viewed 7 times
The new French Foreign Legion captain was assigned to a remote post
in the desert. During his first inspection, he noticed a camel hitched up
behind the mess tent.
He asks ...
Viewed 7 times
A young couple, just married, was in their honeymoon suite on their wedding night. As they were undressing for bed, the husband who was a big burly man tossed his pants to his ...
Viewed 7 times
A blonde went to her mail box several times before it was even time for the
postman to make his rounds.
A neighbor noticed her repeated trips to the curb and asked if she was ...
Viewed 7 times
Harmless? If you always thought those little green garden snakes were O.K., read on:
Green Garden Grass snakes can be dangerous. Yes, grass snakes, not rattlesnakes. A couple in ...
Viewed 6 times
An Interesting Discovery. Lawrence Livermore Laboratories has discovered the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium (symbol=Gv), has one ...
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Dear recipient, Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender ...
Viewed 6 times
The American businessman was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellowfin ...
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Because you're old enough now to know what REALLY happened...
Viewed 6 times
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down Finally, the guys' side of the story. (I must admit, it's pretty good.) We always hear"the rules" from the female ...
Viewed 6 times
A man took his wife to the rodeo and one of the exhibits is that of breeding
bulls.
They went up to the first pen and there was a sign that said, "This bull
mated 50 times ...
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