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Viewed 22 times
Sven was going for his morning walk one day when he walked past Ole's house and saw a sign that said, "Boat For Sale."
This confused Sven because he knew that Ole didn't own a ...
Viewed 18 times
A guy named Bill receives a free ticket to the SuperBowl from
his company.
Unfortunately, when Bill arrives at the stadium, he realizes the
seat is in the last row in the ...
Viewed 17 times
The Titanic, on her maiden voyage, just set sail from the shores of England.
It was the most magnificent ship ever built, and everybody is very excited. No expense has been ...
Viewed 16 times
Q: How many Freudian analysts does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Two, one to change the bulb and one to hold the penis, I mean ladder.
Viewed 16 times
A fellow bought a new Mercedes and was out on the interstate for a nice
evening drive. The top was down, the breeze was blowing through what was
left of his hair and he decided ...
Viewed 15 times
TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM - You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the
income.
AN AMERICAN ...
Viewed 14 times
Quote of the week
"I think he's got quite the balls to open up a store nude.''
- Toronto city councilor George Mammoliti, referring to store owner
Malcolm Scott's practice ...
Viewed 13 times
If only it were this easy...
Bush and Osama decided to settle the war once and for all. They sat down
and decided to settle the whole dispute with one dog fight. They would ...
Viewed 13 times
NOTICE FROM CARNIVAL CRUISE LINES:
Afghanistan Cruise
We at Carnival Cruise Lines didn't forget that a lot of entertainers had promised to leave the country if George W.Bush ...
Viewed 10 times
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down Finally, the guys' side of the story. (I must admit, it's pretty good.) We always hear"the rules" from the female ...
Viewed 10 times
A paratrooper calls his dad after his first day of paratrooping. His dad
asks "So, did you jump?" He says "I will get to that."
When he was airborne the drill captain opened ...
Viewed 10 times
Thursday January 4 7:50 AM ET
Car Thieves Drink HIV-Infected Blood
RIO DE JANEIRO (Reuters) - Two members of a gang of Brazilian car
thieves may have drank vials of ...
Viewed 10 times
20 Useful Expressions for High-Stress Days
1. Well, aren't we just a ray of f_cking sunshine?
2. Not the brightest crayon in the box now, are we?
3. A hard-on doesn't ...
Viewed 10 times
Boris Yeltsin, Bill Clinton and Bill Gates were invited to have dinner
with God. During dinner He told them: "I need three important people
to send my message out to all ...
Viewed 10 times
Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846.
John F. Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946.
Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860.
John F. Kennedy was ...
Viewed 10 times
Monday October 8 7:14 AM ET
Police Use Helicopter for Doughnut Run
ALBUQUERQUE (Reuters) - An Albuquerque policeman and his pilot face disciplinary measures after using a ...
Viewed 9 times
A lawyer runs a stop sign and gets pulled over by a sheriff's deputy in Opp , Alabama . He thinks that he is smarter than the deputy because he is a lawyer from New ...
Viewed 9 times
My husband came home with a tube of KY jelly and said, "This will make you
happy tonight." He was right. When he went out of the bedroom, I squirted it
all over the doorknobs. ...
Viewed 9 times
Number10:
"Scattered @#$% ing showers, my ass!"
- Noah, 4314 BC
Number 9:
"How the @#$% did you work that out?"
- Pythagorus, 126 BC
Number 8:
"You want WHAT ...
Viewed 9 times
Tom Clancy: "I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural,
wholesome things that money can buy."
Steve Martin: "You know 'that look' women get when they want sex? ...
Viewed 9 times
Bill of Rights restated
State Representative Mitchell Kaye of Georgia wrote the following:
We, the sensible people of the United States, in an attempt to help
everyone get ...
Viewed 8 times
Just wanted to warn everyone there's a new virus
-code name is "Work." If you receive "Work" from
your colleagues, your boss, or any one else, do not
touch "Work" under any ...
Viewed 8 times
I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Rick the computer
guy, to come over. Rick clicked a couple of buttons and solved the
problem. He gave me a bill for a minimum ...
Viewed 8 times
The following pseudo-mathematical proof was posted to rec.games.board:
What about this:
We know that women like two things, your time and your money,
therefore...
women ...
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