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MacGregor the Fence Builder

Viewed 10 times
A Scottish old-timer in Scotland, in a bar, says to a young man, "Lad, look out there to the field. Do ya see that fence? Look how well it's built. I built that fence stone by ...

Better with age

Viewed 9 times
Strange Therapy Sessions A couple, both age 76, went to a sex therapist's office. The doctor asked, "What can I do for you?" The man said, "Will you watch us have sexual ...

Thanksgiving Dinner

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Thanksgiving Dinner Martha Stewart will not be dining with us this Thanksgiving. I'm telling you in advance, so don't act surprised. Since Ms. Stewart won't be coming, I've ...

Haircut

Viewed 8 times
A guy stuck his head into a barber shop and asked, "How long before I can get a haircut?" The barber looked around the shop full of customers and said, "About 2 hours." The guy ...

Old Sex

Viewed 8 times
An elderly couple is enjoying an anniversary dinner together in a small tavern. The husband leans over and asks his wife, "Do you remember the first time we had sex together ...

Barbie's letter to Santa

Viewed 8 times
Dear Santa:  Listen you fat little troll, I've been helping you out every year, playing at being the perfect Christmas present, wearing skimpy bathing suits in frigid ...

Words of Wisdom 2

Viewed 8 times
1. I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow, isn't looking good either. 2. I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as ...

Good Advice From Grandpa

Viewed 7 times
I hope that this will once again confirm that the most important information in your life won't come from a teacher, the library or the internet, but from a mentor, and on a ...

Quote of the week 7

Viewed 7 times
"But we're not homophobic... we are compassionate towards anyone who wants to try and give up that kind of lifestyle." - The Rev Dr. Glenn Davies, rector of St Luke's, Sydney, ...

At the Doctor's Office

Viewed 7 times
A young brunette goes into the doctor's office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it. "Impossible," says the doctor. "Show me." She takes her finger and ...

The Best Chain Letter a Woman Will Ever Get

Viewed 7 times
The Best Chain Letter a Woman Will Ever Get This chain letter started in the hopes of bringing relief and happiness to tired housewives. It has, however, expanded its usefulness ...

The Fly

Viewed 7 times
There was a fly buzzing around a barn one day when he happened on a pile of fresh cow manure. Due to the fact that it had been hours since his last meal, he flew down and began ...

How to Call the Police

Viewed 6 times
George Phillips of Meridian Mississippi was going up to bed when his wife told him that he'd left the light on in the garden shed, which she could see from the bedroom window. ...

Wal-Mart Wine

Viewed 6 times
PLANT CITY, FL - Some Wal-Mart customers soon will be able to sample a new discount item - Wal-Mart's own brand of wine. The world's largest retail chain is teaming up with E&J ...

Obsessions

Viewed 6 times
A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children, "You all have obsessions," he observed. To the first mother, he said, ...

Rooster

Viewed 6 times
A farmer wanted to have his hens serviced, so he went to the market looking for a rooster. He was hoping he could get a special rooster - one that could service all of his many hens ...

Forest Gump goes to Heaven

Viewed 6 times
Heavenly Entrance Exam The day finally arrived: Forrest Gump dies and goes to Heaven. He is met at the Pearly Gates by Saint Peter himself. The gates are closed, however, ...

Engineers

Viewed 6 times
Two engineers were standing in the park. One had a new bike. The other said, "Nice bike. How much?" The first said, "It was free." The other asked, "Wow, how did you get it for ...

Report card

Viewed 6 times
A little girl and her mother were out and about. The girl, out of the blue, asked her mother, "Mommy, How old are you?" The mother responded, "Honey, women don't talk about their ...

King Arthur

Viewed 6 times
King Arthur was in Merlin's laboratory where the good wizard was showing him his latest invention. It was a chastity belt...except it had a rather large hole in the most ...

Clinton's New Dog

Viewed 6 times
As most of you already know, former President Clinton's dog Buddy was killed when he ran out in front of an automobile. A nationwide search is underway to find a replacement for ...

Lessons

Viewed 5 times
Lesson 1 A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When ...

First day of school

Viewed 5 times
It was the first day of school for the kindergarten class; as the teacher walked into the classroom, she notices something written on the blackboard: "T T T 1 A" She looks ...

Justice in the Middle East

Viewed 5 times
A Dutchman, an Australian, and a New Zealander are in Saudi Arabia, sharing a smuggled crate of booze when Saudi police rush in and arrest them. The mere possession of alcohol ...

 

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