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The day after losing his wife in a diving accident,
a man answered his door to find two grim-faced Alaska
State Troopers.
"We're sorry to call on you at this hour, Mr. ...
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A first grade teacher collected well known proverbs. She gave each child
in her class the first half of a proverb and asked them to come up with
the remainder of the proverb. ...
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ADULTERY - The wrong people doing the right thing.
ALIMONY - The screwing you get for the screwing you got.
BABY - A hollow tube with a loud voice at one end
and a complete ...
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TOP 10 MARKETING SLOGANS FOR VIAGRA:
10. Viagra, The quicker dicker upper
9. Viagra, One-a-day, like iron
8. Viagra, When it absolutely, positively has to be there ...
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A penguin is taking a trip when his car suddenly breaks down.
Luckily for him, he finds himself just down the street from a
mechanic. So he pushes his BMW to the shop and asks ...
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You can view all of the News of the Weird at http://www.newsoftheweird.com/
(We have removed actual News of the Weird items to avoid possible copyright infringement.)
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I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless woman who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner. I took out my wallet, ...
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Merry Christmas...
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A redneck was stopped by a game warden in Alabama recently with two ice chests full of fish. He was leaving a cove well known for its fishing. The game warden asked the man, ...
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Here's a one-question IQ Test to help you decide how you should spend the rest of your day ... There is a mute who wants to buy a toothbrush. By imitating the action of ...
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A monkey is sitting in a tree, smoking a joint, when a lizard walks past. The lizard looks up and says to the monkey "Hey! what are you doing?" The monkey says "Smoking a joint, ...
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Possums sleep in the middle of the road with their feet in the air.
There are 5000 types of snakes, and 4998 live in Florida.
There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 ...
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A little boy got on the bus, sat next to a man reading a book, and noticed he had his collar on backwards. Curious, the boy asked why he wore his collar that way.
The man, who ...
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Question: What is the truest definition of Globalization?
Answer: Princess Diana's death.
Question: How come?
Answer: An English princess with an Egyptian boyfriend ...
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It was the first day of school for the kindergarten class; as the
teacher walked into the classroom, she notices something written on
the blackboard: "T T T 1 A"
She looks ...
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1. The later you are, the more excited they are to see you.
2. Dogs will forgive you for playing with other dogs.
3. If a dog is gorgeous, other dogs don't hate it.
...
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1. A murderer is condemned to death. He has to choose between three rooms. The first is full of raging fires, the second is full of assassins with loaded guns, and the third is ...
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Michael Jackson describes his September 11th experience in the March issue of Vibe... "I was in New York (after performing at Madison Square Garden on Sept. 7 and 10), and I got ...
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Candidate Gives Viagra, Calls for Nation to Rise
BOGOTA, Colombia (Reuters) - Promising to invigorate Colombians in the
struggle against war and corruption, a presidential ...
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Larry Walters is among the relatively few who have actually turned their dreams into reality. His story is true, though you may find it hard to believe. Larry was a truck ...
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Hello, and welcome to the mental health hotline...
If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.
If you are codependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.
If ...
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A man with no arms and no legs is out lying on the beach one day,
enjoying his chance to get some sun. All of a sudden, a beautiful woman
walks by and stops. "You poor man," ...
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A local man was found murdered in his home this weekend.
Detectives at the scene found this man face down in his bath tub. The
tub had been filled with milk and corn flakes, ...
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Judy, the editor of trivia publication, was having trouble with her computer.
So she called Dave, the computer guy, over to her desk. Dave clicked a
couple of buttons and ...
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