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Hello, and welcome to the mental health hotline...
If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.
If you are codependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.
If ...
Viewed 9 times
With the average cost for a Nursing Home per day reaching $188.00, there
is a better way when we get old &feeble.
I have ascertained that I can get a nice room at the Holiday ...
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A husband and wife were out playing golf. They tee off and one drive goes to the right and one drive goes to the left. The wife finds her ball in a patch of buttercups. She grabs a ...
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When you take a long time, you're slow.
When your boss takes a long time, he's thorough.
When you don't do it, you're lazy.
When your boss doesn't do it, he's too busy. ...
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Billy, a good, normal ten-year-old boy, and his parents set down to select a summer camp for Billy. There were the usual camps with swimming, canoeing, games, singing by the ...
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After every flight, pilots complete a gripe sheet which conveys to the
mechanics problems encountered with the aircraft during the flight that need
repair or correction. The ...
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A team of archaeologists was excavating in Israel when they came upon a cave. Written on the wall of the cave were the following symbols in order of appearance.
1. A dog
2. A ...
Viewed 7 times
From me ("the Wishor") to you (hereinafter called the "Wishee"): Please accept without obligation, implied or implicit, our best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially ...
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It was the first day of school for the kindergarten class; as the
teacher walked into the classroom, she notices something written on
the blackboard: "T T T 1 A"
She looks ...
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A study in London showed that the kind of "male face" a
woman finds attractive can differ depending on where a
woman is in her menstrual cycle.
For instance, if she is ...
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Trent Dilfer recently returned home and had an incredibly hard time
getting into the front door. It seems someone painted an end zone in
front of the house.
Trent Dilfer was ...
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Strange Therapy Sessions
A couple, both age 76, went to a sex therapist's office. The
doctor asked, "What can I do for you?"
The man said, "Will you watch us have sexual ...
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20 Useful Expressions for High-Stress Days
1. Well, aren't we just a ray of f_cking sunshine?
2. Not the brightest crayon in the box now, are we?
3. A hard-on doesn't ...
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Did you know that Bill Clinton is considering changing the Democratic seal
from a donkey to a condom, because it represents inflation, halts
production, and gives you a false ...
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Two buddies were sitting at the bar in a singles' club
and talking about another guy who was sitting at the
other end of the bar.
"I don't get it," complained the first guy, ...
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Every year, English teachers from across the country can submit their collections of actual similes and metaphors found in high school essays. These excerpts are published each ...
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A very confident James Bond walks into the English bar and takes a seat next
to a very attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance, then casually looks
at his watch for a ...
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Dear God,
How come people love to smell flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one
another? Where are their priorities?
Dear God,
When we get to Heaven, can we sit on your ...
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1. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.
2. I do not need to suddenly stand straight up when
I'm lying under the coffee table.
3. I will not roll my toys behind ...
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20) Can't stick their heads out of Windows '95.
19) Fetch command not available on all platforms.
18) Hard to read the monitor with your head cocked to one side.
17) Too ...
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Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya, after graduating from Northwestern University, same place my dad went to school. On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull ...
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Mike never dreamed that slowly cruising on his Harley Davidson Fat-Boy motorcycle through a residential neighborhood could be so incredibly dangerous! Little did Mike suspect. Mike ...
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A man wanted to get married. He was having trouble choosing among three likely candidates. He gives each woman a present of $5,000 and watches to see what they do with the money. ...
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ARCHITECT: Defines someone who was neither macho enough to become an
engineer nor gay enough to become a designer.
BANKER: Someone who lends you his umbrella when the sun is ...
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