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A very modest lady applied for a job at the factory where they made "Tickle
me Elmo dolls". It was Friday and almost quitting time and hurriedly the
boss told her to report for ...
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100 FUN WAYS TO PHONE IN A PIZZA ORDER
1. If using a touch-tone, press random numbers while ordering. Ask the person taking the order to stop doing that.
2. Make up a ...
Viewed 7 times
10 Things you would NEVER hear a Southerner say:
10) "I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex"
9) Duct tape won't fix that
8) Come to think of it I'll have a Heiniken's
...
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Star Trek TNG Meets Microsoft
Picard: Mr. LaForge, have you had any success with your
attempts at finding a weakness in the Borg? And
Mr. Data, have you been able to access ...
Viewed 6 times
A High School English Teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. She tells the class that there would be no excuse for not showing up, except for a serious injury or ...
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1. Your Houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them. 2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question. 3. You keep more food than beer in the ...
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As Ben Franklin said: In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. In a number of carefully controlled trials, scientists have demonstrated that ...
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When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take it out on someone you don't know...
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WORST FOURSOME IN GOLF
1. MONICA LEWINSKI
2. O.J. SIMPSON
3. TED KENNEDY
4. BILL CLINTON
WHY YOU ASK?
1. MONICA IS A HOOKER
2. O.J. IS A SLICER
3. TED ...
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API - Time Magazine reports an interesting case of high-tech graffiti. It
seems that a couple of Intel engineers working on the design of a recent
version of the Pentium ...
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Interesting but mindless trivia ...
Did you know that.....?
Average life span of a major league baseball: 7 pitches
A duck's quack doesn't echo, and no one knows why.
...
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A Martian couple and an Earthling couple meet and are talking about all sorts of things. Finally, the subject of sex comes up. "Just how do you guys do it?" asks the Earthling.
...
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Santa was very cross. It was Christmas Eve and NOTHING was going right.
Mrs. Claus had burned all the cookies. The elves were complaining about not getting paid for the overtime ...
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A dictionary for software engineers:
Alpha: Software undergoes alpha testing as a first step in
getting user feedback. Alpha is Latin for "doesn't work."
Beta: Software ...
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Teaching Math in 1950:
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production
is 4/5 of the price. What is his profit?
Teaching Math in 1960:
A logger ...
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A 6-year-old and a 4-year-old are upstairs in their bedroom. "You know
what?" says the 6-year-old. "I think it's about time we start cussing." The
4-year-old nods his head in ...
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What US president once said "It is a good thing I am not a woman, as I would
always be pregnant, for I cannot say no"
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This guy walks into a bar down in Alabama and orders a Grape Nehi.
Surprised, the bartender looks around and says
"You ain't from around here... where you from, boy?".
The ...
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21 Very Short Books
1) A Guide to Arab Democracies
2) A Journey through the Mind of Dennis Rodman
3) Amelia Earhart's Guide to the Pacific Ocean
4) Career ...
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COMPUTER, POWER STRIP I worked with an individual who plugged their power strip back into itself and for the life of them could not ...
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News from Hopkins Medical Center......
Yesterday research scientists revealed that beer contains
small traces of female hormones.
To prove their theory, the scientists fed ...
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The following are actual statements made during court cases:
Judge: I know you, don't I?
Defendant: Uh, yes.
Judge: All right, tell me, how do I know you?
Defendant: ...
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More little Johnny! One day, during a lesson on proper grammar, the teacher asked for a show of hands for who could use the word "beautiful" in the same sentence twice. First, ...
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A little know fact that most engineers, technicians and auto mechanics overlook is the magic of smoke.
Yes, smoke.
It is the guts of most everything that works.........
...
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