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LITTLE JOHNNY ON... PHILOSOPHY:
A Teacher asks her class, "If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how many will be left?"
He replies, "None, they ...
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LETTER FROM A FARM KID, NOW AT SAN DIEGO MARINE CORPS RECRUIT DEPOT
Dear Ma and Pa:
I am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Marine Corps beats ...
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A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young
mothers and their small children, "You all have obsessions," he observed.
To the first mother, he said, ...
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Harmless? If you always thought those little green garden snakes were O.K., read on:
Green Garden Grass snakes can be dangerous. Yes, grass snakes, not rattlesnakes. A couple in ...
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The New Pope Ratzinger was not the first choice for Pope. As I understand it, Ratzinger was not the Cardinals first choice. Interestingly, they were considering Cardinal Hans ...
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After 17 years of marriage, a man dumped his wife for his young secretary. His new girlfriend demanded that she wanted to live in the couple's multimillion dollar home, and since ...
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My husband came home with a tube of KY jelly and said, "This will make you
happy tonight." He was right. When he went out of the bedroom, I squirted it
all over the doorknobs. ...
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An old farmer named George went to town to see a movie. The ticket girl
asked "Sir, what is that on your shoulder?"
The old farmer said "That is my pet rooster, Chuckie. Where ...
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10. When they ask "How are you today?" Tell them! "I'm so glad you
asked because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these
problems; my arthritis is acting up, my ...
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Energizer Bunny arrested - charged with battery. A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking. A pessimist's blood type is always b-negative. My wife really ...
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Here is a form letter for those who don't quite know how to say goodbye. select the appropriate section and end relationship. To (Type in their email address): From (Your ...
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I usually don't forward these little heart warmers, but thought this one is worth reading.
This is truly a heartwarming story about the bond formed between a little girl and ...
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I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a female driver cut right in
front of a pickup truck. The guy had to drive on to the shoulder to avoid
hitting the woman. This ...
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Question: What is the truest definition of Globalization?
Answer: Princess Diana's death.
Question: How come?
Answer: An English princess with an Egyptian boyfriend ...
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Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly
gates. "In honor of this holy season," Saint Peter said, "you must each
possess something that ...
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The following pseudo-mathematical proof was posted to rec.games.board:
What about this:
We know that women like two things, your time and your money,
therefore...
women ...
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SHE WAS SO BLONDE THAT....
She sent me a fax with a stamp on it.
She tripped over the cordless phone.
At the bottom of the application where it says "sign here", she ...
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Top ten reasons God created Eve:
10. God worried that Adam would always be lost in
the garden because men hate to ask for directions.
9. God knew that Adam would one day ...
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A very modest lady applied for a job at the factory where they made "Tickle
me Elmo dolls". It was Friday and almost quitting time and hurriedly the
boss told her to report for ...
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A man was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent over, picked up the frog, and put it in his ...
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A guy stuck his head into a barber shop and asked, "How long before I can get a haircut?" The barber looked around the shop full of customers and said, "About 2 hours." The guy ...
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True bravery is a guy arriving home late after a boy's night out, being assaulted by his wife with a broom, and having the guts to ask: "You still cleaning, or are you gonna be ...
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I hope that this will once again confirm that the most important
information in your life won't come from a teacher, the library or the
internet, but from a mentor, and on a ...
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