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What's in a Name

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4/1/2001 San Francisco's Golden Gate Bridge to officially become the TransAmerica Bridge. by contributing editor April Olfos (SAN FRANCISCO-UPI) The city of San ...

Poor Maria

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Maria is a devout Catholic: She gets married and has 17 children. Soon after the last child is born her husband dies. A few weeks later she remarries and over the following ...

Punch Lines

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick. What is a zebra? 26 sizes larger than an "A" bra. What kind of coffee was served on the Titanic? Sanka. ...

Cave Symbols

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A team of archaeologists was excavating in Israel when they came upon a cave. Written on the wall of the cave were the following symbols in order of appearance. 1. A dog 2. A ...

Anger Management

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When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take it out on someone you don't know...

Quick Ones 4

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1. How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit? Unique Up On It 2. How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit? Tame Way, Unique Up On It 3. How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest? ...

Nursery Rhyme Haiku

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I am a teapot Here is handle, here is spout I am a teapot Mary had a lamb Followed her to school one day Children laughed and played There were three blind ...

Windows Start

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A revised version of the default Windows startup sound…

Sipping Vodka

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Sipping Vodka A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak. After mass he asked the monsignor how he had done. The monsignor replied,"When I am ...

100 Years Ago

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It may be hard to believe how times have changed in the last 100 years. "100 Years Ago" The average life expectancy in the United States was forty-seven. Only 14 ...

Brian's Bad Day

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Gives the words "bad day" a whole new perspective... Brian is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers out of Louisiana and performs underwater repairs on offshore ...

Interview

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The executive was interviewing a young blonde for a position in his company. He wanted to find out something about her personality so he asked, "If you could have a ...

Future Darwin Award Nominees

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For those who are unfamiliar with the Darwin Award, it is given to those who prove by their actions that Darwin was right... People that stupid don't survive long enought to ...

What does a soul mean when it says 'Abort Retry Ignore Fail'

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Yes, but it's common knowledge that Bill forfeited his soul to Satan to get where he is today. Well, that's the short story. Bill actually forfeited his soul simply for the ...

Capitalism and Cows

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TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM - You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income. AN AMERICAN ...

One-Question IQ Test

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Here's a one-question IQ Test to help you decide how you should spend the rest of your day ... There is a mute who wants to buy a toothbrush.  By imitating the action of ...

Monkey, Lizard, and a Crocodile

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A monkey is sitting in a tree, smoking a joint, when a lizard walks past. The lizard looks up and says to the monkey "Hey! what are you doing?" The monkey says "Smoking a joint, ...

Generic name for Viagra

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In pharmacology, all drugs have two names; a trade name and a generic name.For example, the trade name of Tylenol has a generic name of acetaminophen. Aleve is also called ...

Interesting

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Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at an Elingsh uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a word are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is that the frist and lsat ltteer is at ...

BARS virus

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The World Health Organization (WHO) has just issued an urgent warning about BARS (Beer Alcohol Requirement Syndrome). A newly identified problem has spread rapidly throughout ...

Trouble at the airport

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At Heathrow Airport today, an individual, later discovered to be a public school teacher, was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a compass, a ...

Fishing

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Every Saturday morning Fred goes fishing. He gets up early and eager, makes his lunch, hooks up his boat and off he goes... all day long. Well, one Saturday morning he gets up ...

Quick Ones 5

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Dijon vu - the same mustard as before. Practice safe eating - always use condiments. Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death. A man needs a mistress just to break the ...

Perfect Made Imperfect

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First the Lord made man in the Garden of Eden. Then he said to himself, "There's something he's needing" After casting about for a suitable pearl, He kept messing around ...

 

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