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Who is Jack Schitt

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The Lineage Revealed: Many people are at a loss for a response when someone says "you don't know Jack Schitt". Now, You can handle the situation. Jack is the only son of Awe ...

Golf 4

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"My friend," said St. Peter to the recently deceased, "you did lead an exemplary life on earth-but there is one instance of your taking the name of The Lord in vain. Would you ...

Microsoft Windaz 2000

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New Australian version of Windows...
Aussie Windaz 2000

Lipstick at School

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According to a news report, a certain private school in Washington recently was faced with a unique problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and ...

Santa's Little Helpers

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I suppose this explains why he's always so jolly...
Santa's little helpers

48 phrases we wish we could say at work

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1. Ahhh... I see the f_ck-up fairy has visited us again... 2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce. 3. How about never? Is never good for ...

Prince Philip quotes

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Queen Elizabeth's husband, Prince Philip, recently got into trouble for telling a young boy he was too fat to be an astronaut. Here then are a few other choice quotes from ...

Embarrassing Moment

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OB-GYN - Most Embarrassing Moment This is a laugh for all those women out there (and the men who love them) who so look forward to that wonderful time once a year when they ...

Blonde Joke 11

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The police academy instructor was conducting an in-class survey, questioning three blonde female officers who were training to become detectives. To test their skills in ...

Things I've Learned

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Things I've Learned as I've Matured... I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in. I've learned ...

Dogs and Cats

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WHAT IS A CAT ? 1) Cats do what they want 2) They rarely listen to you 3) They're totally unpredictable 4) They whine when they are not happy 5) When you want to ...

The Best Chain Letter a Woman Will Ever Get

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The Best Chain Letter a Woman Will Ever Get This chain letter started in the hopes of bringing relief and happiness to tired housewives. It has, however, expanded its usefulness ...

How old do you feel

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How Old Do You Feel? To get an idea of the lives of those entering college this fall, read on......... and try not to laugh............... 1. The people who are starting ...

Redneck Rules of Etiquette

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Redneck Rules of Etiquette ENTERTAINING IN YOUR HOME 1. A centerpiece for the table should never be anything prepared by a taxidermist. 2. Do not allow the dog to eat at ...

WHAT MEN REALLY MEAN

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WHAT MEN REALLY MEAN "I'm going fishing." Really means, "I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid, and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by ...

Cave Symbols

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A team of archaeologists was excavating in Israel when they came upon a cave. Written on the wall of the cave were the following symbols in order of appearance. 1. A dog 2. A ...

Tips for Northerners moving South

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Tips for Northerners moving South 1. Save all manner of bacon grease. You will be instructed later how to use it. 2. If you forget a Southerner's name, refer to him (or ...

Seminars

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SEMINARS FOR FEMALES (prepared and presented by males) 1. Elementary Map Reading 2. Crying and Law Enforcement 3. Advanced Math Seminar: Programming Your VCR 4. You ...

News of the Weird

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You can view all of the News of the Weird at http://www.newsoftheweird.com/ (We have removed actual News of the Weird items to avoid possible copyright infringement.)

Giving up wine

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I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless woman who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner. I took out my wallet, ...

Holiday Eating Tips

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1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where ...

One-Question IQ Test

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Here's a one-question IQ Test to help you decide how you should spend the rest of your day ... There is a mute who wants to buy a toothbrush.  By imitating the action of ...

Interesting

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Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at an Elingsh uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a word are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is that the frist and lsat ltteer is at ...

Witness

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In a trial, in a small SC town, a prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the stand. She was sworn in, asked if she would tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing ...

 

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