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Viewed 29 times
Too much time, and tequila, and too many limes...
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10 Things you would NEVER hear a Southerner say:
10) "I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex"
9) Duct tape won't fix that
8) Come to think of it I'll have a Heiniken's
...
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20 Ways To Confuse Santa Claus
Instead of milk and cookies, leave him a salad, and a note explaining that you think he could stand to lose a few pounds.
While he's in the ...
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I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Rick the computer
guy, to come over. Rick clicked a couple of buttons and solved the
problem. He gave me a bill for a minimum ...
Viewed 22 times
Ya know, just make up your own joke here...
Viewed 22 times
TOP TWENTY REASONS WHY CHOCOLATE IS BETTER THAN SEX:
1) You can GET chocolate.
2) "If you love me you'll swallow that" has real meaning with chocolate.
3) Chocolate ...
Viewed 21 times
MICROSOFT Bids to Acquire Catholic Church
By Hank Vorjes
VATICAN CITY (AP) - In a joint press conference in St. Peter's Square
this morning, MICROSOFT Corp. and the Vatican ...
Viewed 19 times
If only it were this easy...
Bush and Osama decided to settle the war once and for all. They sat down
and decided to settle the whole dispute with one dog fight. They would ...
Viewed 19 times
Number10:
"Scattered @#$% ing showers, my ass!"
- Noah, 4314 BC
Number 9:
"How the @#$% did you work that out?"
- Pythagorus, 126 BC
Number 8:
"You want WHAT ...
Viewed 19 times
API - Time Magazine reports an interesting case of high-tech graffiti. It
seems that a couple of Intel engineers working on the design of a recent
version of the Pentium ...
Viewed 18 times
COMPUTER, POWER STRIP I worked with an individual who plugged their power strip back into itself and for the life of them could not ...
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TOP 10 OLD FOLKS' PARTY GAMES
1. Sag - You're It!
2. Pin the Toupee on the Bald Guy
3. 20 Questions Shouted into your Good Ear
4. Kick the Bucket
5. Red Rover, Red ...
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They always ask at the doctor's office why you are there, and you have to answer in front of others what's wrong and sometimes it is embarrassing. There's nothing worse ...
Viewed 17 times
They were alone in the house. It was a cold, dark stormy night. The
storm had come up quickly and each time the thunder boomed he watched
her jump.
She looked across the ...
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20 Useful Expressions for High-Stress Days
1. Well, aren't we just a ray of f_cking sunshine?
2. Not the brightest crayon in the box now, are we?
3. A hard-on doesn't ...
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A recent survey of boat owners revealed that only 13% of them would
go overboard to save their spouse. However 25% would go overboard
to save their hat.
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Redneck Swimming Pool...
Redneck Yacht...
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The following pseudo-mathematical proof was posted to rec.games.board:
What about this:
We know that women like two things, your time and your money,
therefore...
women ...
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The Titanic, on her maiden voyage, just set sail from the shores of England.
It was the most magnificent ship ever built, and everybody is very excited. No expense has been ...
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A dictionary for software engineers:
Alpha: Software undergoes alpha testing as a first step in
getting user feedback. Alpha is Latin for "doesn't work."
Beta: Software ...
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LETTER FROM A FARM KID, NOW AT SAN DIEGO MARINE CORPS RECRUIT DEPOT
Dear Ma and Pa:
I am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Marine Corps beats ...
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Santa was very cross. It was Christmas Eve and NOTHING was going right.
Mrs. Claus had burned all the cookies. The elves were complaining about not getting paid for the overtime ...
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A lawyer runs a stop sign and gets pulled over by a sheriff's deputy in Opp , Alabama . He thinks that he is smarter than the deputy because he is a lawyer from New ...
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