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Added 2/9/1998
"Sara," said the husband, "I just got a letter from the IRS. How should I dress for my meeting? In my Armani suit or in my jeans?"
"Jacob," his wife replied, "I'm going to tell ...
Added 2/7/1998
The CIA, the FBI, and the LAPD all claimed to be the best at apprehending criminals. Finally they agreed on a test. A large forest was subdivided into three sections, and a rabbit ...
Added 2/6/1998
The other day, a woman came out of the kitchen and when her husband approached, she slapped him up side the head, WHACK! He was a little dazed and asked, "What was that for?"
...
Added 2/5/1998
A married couple went to the hospital to have their baby deliavered.
Upon their arrival, the doctor said he had invented a new machine
that would transfer a portion of the ...
Added 2/5/1998
The following quotes were taken from actual medical records dictated by physicians. They appeared in a column written by Richard Lederer, Ph.D., for the Journal of Court Reporting. ...
Added 2/5/1998
A few months ago, there was an opening with the CIA for an assassin.
These highly classified positions are hard to fill, and there's a lot of
testing and background checks ...
Added 2/5/1998
Six reasons computers must be female..
6. As soon as you have one, a better one is just around the corner.
5. No one but their creator understands their internal logic.
4. ...
Added 2/5/1998
Hillary Clinton was walking the grounds of the White House when she came across a little boy with a litter of newborn pups. She asks the boy what kind of puppies they were. He ...
Added 2/4/1998
The board of health has proposed that warning signs be placed on booze
bottles to tip off drinkers about the possible peril of pounding a pint or
two...
1. WARNING: ...
Added 2/4/1998
Cinderella wants to go to the ball, but her wicked stepmother won't let her.
As Cinderella sits crying in the garden, her fairy godmother appears and
promises to provide ...
Added 2/3/1998
Two rednecks, Bubba and Earl, were driving down the road drinking a couple of bottles of Bud. The passenger, Bubba, said "lookey thar up ahead, Earl, it's a PO-lease roadblock!! We ...
Added 2/3/1998
An artist, a lawyer, and a computer scientist are discussing the merits of a mistress.
An artist tells of the passion, the thrill which comes with the risk of being discovered. ...
Added 2/1/1998
SEMINARS FOR FEMALES (prepared and presented by males)
1. Elementary Map Reading
2. Crying and Law Enforcement
3. Advanced Math Seminar: Programming Your VCR
4. You ...
Added 1/27/1998
This guy was out hunting one day; he had all the gear, the jacket the boots and the double-barreled shotgun. As he was climbing over a fence, he dropped the gun and it went off, ...
Added 1/23/1998
A guy walks into a bar with an octopus under his arm. He sets the
octopus on a stool next to him and announces: "This is an amazing
octopus. I'll bet anyone in this bar that ...
Added 1/23/1998
A local business was looking for office help. They put a sign in the
window, stating the following: "HELP WANTED. Must be able to type,
must be good with a computer and must be ...
Added 1/23/1998
One night, a police officer was stalking out a particularly rowdy bar
for possible violations of the driving-under-the-influence laws.
At closing time, he saw a fellow stumble ...
Added 1/23/1998
Drinking on the Job
While most companies refrain from allowing consumption of alcohol on the
premises, there are some good arguments for changing that policy.
Reasons for ...
Added 1/20/1998
Sean was lyin' on his deathbed with his lifelong friend by
his side.
"Paddy, me dear friend, ye remember that grand case o'
scotch we won at poker when we were in the ...
Added 1/19/1998
MICROSOFT VIRGIN
Did you hear about the woman who was married to a succession of three
Microsoft employees and still died a virgin?
Her first husband was in Training, and ...
Added 1/16/1998
HOW TO SATISFY A WOMAN EVERY TIME
Lick, paw, ogle, caress, praise, pamper, relish, savor, massage,
empathize, serenade, compliment, support, dig, floralize, feed,
laminate, ...
Added 1/13/1998
Howard had felt guilty all day long. No matter how much he tried to forget about it, he couldn't. The guilt and sense of betrayal was overwhelming.
But, every once in a while, ...
Added 1/13/1998
It's the Spring of 1957 and Bobby goes to pick up his date. He's a pretty hip guy with his own car. When he goes to the front door, the girl's father answers and invites him in.
...
Added 1/9/1998
WHY DOGS ARE BETTER THAN WOMEN
Dogs love it when your friends come over.
Dogs don't expect you to call when you are running late.
The later you are, the more excited dogs ...
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