A fellow who absolutely hated his wife's cat decided to get rid of him one day while his wife was gone. He drove the cat 20 blocks from his home and left him in a nice park. As he was getting home, the cat was leisurely walking up the driveway.
The next day, he decided to try again. This time he drove the cat 40 blocks away from the house and the same thing happened again... as he was driving back up his driveway, there sat the cat on the front steps!
He kept taking the cat further and further away from the house, and the darn cat would always beat him back home. At last, he decided to drive a few miles away, turn right, then left, past the old stone bridge, then right again and another right until he reached what he thought was a safe distance from his home and left the cat there.
Several hours later, the fellow called home to his wife and asked her, "Jan, is the cat there?"
"Yes," his wife replied. "Why do you ask?"
Really frustrated, the poor guy answered, "Put that darn cat on the phone, I'm lost and need directions to get home!"