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Speeding ticket

For anyone who has ever gotten a speeding ticket...

This guy is flying down the road, and he comes over a bridge. Sure enough, a cop with a radar gun is sitting on the other side of the bridge and pulls him over.

The cop walks up to the guy's car and asks, "What's the hurry?"

The guy says, "I'm late for work."

"What do you do?"

The guy responds, "Well, I'm a rectum stretcher."

The cop says, "What? A rectum stretcher?"

The guy says, "Yeah. I start with a finger, then work my way up to two fingers... eventually I get a hand in, then both hands, and I slowly stretch it until it's about six feet wide."

The cop asks, "What do you do with a six-foot asshole?"

"Well, you give him a radar gun and park him at the end of a bridge..."

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