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Little Johnny (show-and-tell)

One Monday morning, Little Johnny's kindergarten teacher, Miss Needlemeyer, decided to have a special show-and-tell session in which each child could tell about something exciting that happened at home over the weekend.

Mary Anne related the tale of how her cat, Clawz, was stuck up in their elm tree for a whole hour before the firemen came.

Peter explained how his mother burned their dinner and set the kitchen on fire, but the whole family laughed about it later.

Erin told the class about her new baby brother was born Sunday afternoon.

Finally it was time for Little Johnny to tell his tale. Now, Miss Needlemeyer wasn't terribly fond of Little Johnny because he always needed to out-do the other children. Also, his show-and-tell presentations tended to be rather graphic at times.

Little Johnny stood and walked calmly to the front of the classroom. He picked up the chalk and made a small, round dot on the chalkboard. He then returned to his seat without a word.

"Uh, Johnny, what is that?" asked Miss Needlemeye, pointing to the dot on the board.

"That's a period," replied Little Johnny. "My sister missed one this weekend."

Miss Needlemeyer gasped but re-collected herself.

"Do you know what that means, Johnny?" she asked.

"Hell if I know," replied the eloquent Johnny. "All I know is that after Sis told everybody, Daddy shit, Momma fainted and the man next door shot himself."

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