Democrats' Golf Rules
1. Democrats get to keep shooting until one gets par
or an acceptable score.
2. Democrats are allowed to keep score by hand,
Republicans are not allowed to keep score at all: the
Democrats will appoint someone to keep score for
3. If a Republican shoots par or under par on a
hole, a Democratic appointee will sue in a Court
with a Democratic Judge for a ruling that the
score is invalid.
4. Holes for Democrats will be 3 ft in diameter (to
allow less confusion; Republicans will use the PGA
regulation size holes.
5. If a democrat misses his shot, it will be counted
as having been sunk if the Democrat intended it to
go in, and can certify this by written statement
to Rev. Jessie Jackson.
6. Scores by Democrats can be changed after the
round, if they can prove one of the following:
a) Trees were improperly placed on the course;
b) Wind speed was too strong;
c) Water was placed on the course in a way that
confused the Democrat on club selection