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Life's Mathematics


Life's Mathematics


ROMANCE MATHEMATICS

Smart man +  smart woman = romance

Smart man +  dumb woman = affair

Dumb man +  smart woman = marriage

Dumb man +  dumb woman = pregnancy



OFFICE ARITHMETIC

Smart boss +  smart employee = profit

Smart boss +  dumb employee = production

Dumb boss +  smart employee = promotion

Dumb boss +  dumb employee = overtime



SHOPPING MATH

A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.



GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.

To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

Married men live longer than single men, but married men are a lot more willing to die.

Any married man should forget his mistakes, there's no use in two people remembering the same thing.

Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.

Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.

A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that, is the beginning of a new argument.

There are 2 times when a man doesn't understand a woman - before marriage and after marriage.




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